The Model UN Mishap
by Silver the Kid
Summary: Yugi & co. & others are in a Model UN and but unfortunatly Jounouchi and Kaiba wont stop waging war on each other long enough for the model UN to be succseful. Rated for cursing and education.


A/N: this story is just for fun, so PLEASE don't start flaming me because of "wrong" statements (most of them are intentionally ignorant, and others are my own personal opinion). This was inspired by my Model UN experience (where I was Ireland in the Special political, and the Netherlands and I tried to destroy America AND U.K and failed MISERABLY) and remembered how entertainingly hilarious it had been. Its always fun when teeny tiny countries try and take out the big powers. Also, Kaiba might be a tad out of character... so lets just say he had some DAMN good orange juice that morning and was a bit out of his head for the rest of that day. Kay? Kay.

Disclaimer: No owning, No owning! Yu-Gi-Oh! Is NOT mine, and thank god. I don't know how many fans the show would have if I had episodes like my stories. Hah hah. Enjoy.

It was one of those boring days where you wanted to jump out the window and risk having serious injuries and possible death just to escape the extreme boredom school was offering. The class was chatting in their homeroom waiting for the arrival of the social studies teacher.

"At last, I have you right where I want you!" Honda bellowed in a mock manly voice as he held his best friend Jounouchi in a headlock, giving his hair a good ruffling session.

"Piss off Honda! Lemme go ya Jerk!" Jounouchi squirmed to get lose, flailing his arms and trying to step on Honda's feet.

"You're a jerk!"

"Your FACE is a jerk! Now let Go!" Jounouchi finally succeeded in freeing himself and pushed his taller friend away.

"Well, you had it coming. You'll think twice before trying to start a fight with me! haha!" Honda struck a pose for victory.

"It's so like stupid little puppies to try and take on bigger and stronger dogs." Kaiba muttered from his desk behind theirs. Jounouchi was about to respond with violent intentions when the teacher walked in.

"Good morning class. Please take your seats." She smiled as the class obliged. "Today I think we should do something fun! Have any of your ever partaken in a Model UN before?" No one responded. "Good! Then this should be a fun and interesting experience for you all! Now I've already chosen who will represent what country. Then what we will do is discuss global issues and try to make decisions on them. First we'll start with Japan! Mouto-san, you will be representing our nation."

"Hey, way t'go Yugi!" Jounouchi gave his friend the thumbs up. Yugi smiled.

"The U.S will be represented by Kaiba-san." The teacher continued.

"Ha, he's an arrogant asshole like the Americans! He's perfect for them!" Jounouchi teased. Kaiba glared daggers into the back of the blonde's head. Kaiba decided it didn't matter what the mutt said, because he was representing the most powerful and richest country in the world (and seeing as he was the most powerful and richest person in Domino it seemed fitting) and he had veto power. Whatever country Jounouchi was, he'd eat them alive.

The teacher continued to tell the class who they were. Honda was France, Anzu was China, and Otogi was the U.K.

"Jounouchi-san, you will be representing Canada." She smiled at the blonde, finding it amusing that loud, disruptive Jounouchi would be playing the role of quite and polite Canada.

"Um, no offence but Canada isn't a country. It's the largest state in America." A student stated, causing the more informed classmates to laugh.

"No, Canada is it's own country. It just simply depends on the Americans to survive. YOU, Jounouchi, are my underdog!" Kaiba smiled. It was TOO perfect. Jounouchi would have to go along with EVERYTHING he wanted.

"Heh! That makes you my underdog too!" Otogi laughed. "Seeing as my country pretty much owns yours."

"WHAT? I don't want to be Canada! Not if THOSE two people are going to be controlling me! This SUCKS!" Jounouchi was understandably outraged. After all, both Kaiba and Otogi were mean CEO's that called him a dog all the time. The teacher must have done this on purpose!

"Yes, so give me all your fresh water, Canada." Kaiba demanded.

"No!"

"Yes, or I will blow up your country with my nuclear bombs."

"Can he threaten me for my water?!" Jounouchi asked the teacher.

"Well... I'm not sure if this would take place during a U.N session..." The teacher frowned. "Now, the first issue I'd like to discuss is-"

"You CAN'T have my water!" Jounouchi stood up, all attitude. "I ain't no push over puppy! It's MINE!"

"I'll just take it by force then." Kaiba shrugged.

"I dare ya! You bomb my country with one'a your nuclear warheads, and you'll get taken out too! We're attached!"

"FINE! Then I'll just storm in with tanks and machine guns and take you out that way! My military is 10 times stronger then yours, so it doesn't matter HOW we fight! I'll win regardless!"

"Hey, didn't Canada WIN the war of 1812?" Jounouchi challenged.

"Well, it depends on whose text book your reading, but the fact is that it was a draw." Anzu piped up.

"Yeah, but WE won more battles and had greater victories!" Jounouchi almost bragged, even though he had absolutely no claim to the war what so ever. "We BURNED the freakin' white house! OH yea, Kaiba! Suck on THAT!"

"SO? America burned the Parliamentary buildings in Toronto."

"The WHITE HOUSE, man! The WHITE HOUSE!"

"It was a DRAW, Jounouchi! A DRAW!" Kaiba was getting irritated with this irrelevant tangent Jounouchi had gotten them on.

"Do you think the American's would of agreed to draw and give back all the land if they were going to win? Canada would of WON! Got that Kaiba? You LOST bud! So you just TRY and take me on! I'll beat you again!"

"Jounouchi you're taking this WAY to serious." Honda sighed, but he knew all to well Jounouchi got into anything with role playing involved... infact he was easy to get carried away.

"Your out of character Jounouchi-san." The Teacher scolded. "Now, on to the issues I want us to discuss. First, Aids in Africa-"

"Birth control! End of discussion." Jounouchi blurted.

"I think it's against their religion to use birth control." Otogi frowned.

"There's the problem! Religion is SUCH a pain!" Honda shouted. "It causes more problems then it solves."

"Yeah, I think I agree with you, Honda. Like, way back, people like Charlemagne would kill people who didn't convert to Christianity." Otogi explained.

"See? Religion is dumb."

"Religion is NOT dumb, you can't say that! You can't SAY that!" Anzu glared.

"It's a very good idea actually. If everyone followed the 10 commandments, then our world would be practically perfect!" Yugi smiled, naturally siding with Anzu. The teacher once more tried to get the class back on track but was ignored.

"In CANADA," Jounouchi started to brag, "We let everyone keep their religion so you can't say WE'RE forcing people to convert. Unlike YOUR country, Kaiba."

"To bad, give me your water."

"Go to hell! I'm the bigger country!"

"Heh, but I have more of everything. More people, more power, more money, more military-"

"More stupidity! Boo yeah!" Jounouchi mentally patted himself on the back for that 'burn' despite the fact that it wasn't very good or witty. "'Sides. You don't got more of EVERYTHING. We have more space, more forestry and more fresh water, which is what we're arguing about."

"You know, why don't you just surrender your whole country to me?"

"NEVER! You wont take it as long as I live and breathe!" Jounouchi was dramatic, striking a pose.

"Canada's fresh water is NOT an issue I wanted to discuss, may we PLEASE get back to what's important." The teacher attempted once more.

"Destroying you will not be a difficult task." Kaiba smirked.

"Oh yeah? Well I have the U.K on my side!" Jounouchi Turned to Otogi. "Right?"

"Maybe 100 years ago, but recently the U.K wont go against the states. That would be a stupid move. They have become more powerful. Sorry. I'm going to have to stay neutral."

"Otogi! What are you? Sweden? Ah, your no help. FRANCE will help me!"

"Oh yeah, for sure bud!" Honda smiled moving to sit beside his friend. "Your half French anyway!"

"That's right! Haha! Je suis un mot chien!!"

"Did you say you were a word dog?" Otogi blinked.

"I dunno. I was just trying to talk cool French. Y'know how those North American people talk 'wassup wassup dog? WORD, yo!' or some weirdness like that. Man, what was Canada? A mixed breed of French, English and... Native?"

"Well the country certainly suits you then, chien." Kaiba couldn't resist.

"That's it! Japan, join our alliance against the American scum! He's going down!" Jounouchi waved Yugi over to his desk.

"Um...Ok. But it's not at all realistic."

"Who cares? China! Come on Anzu, join!"

"Um..." Anzu glanced at the teacher who was taking some aspirin and shrugged. "Ok!"

"Yea! I have two countries on my team with Veto power. Take that Kaiba." Jounouchi rudely stuck out his tongue at his rival.

"I'll still defeat you and take your country!" Kaiba was becoming angry, and he wasn't sure if it was because everyone was going against him (the stupid ignorant jerks, don't they know how to show respect for the most powerful country in the world?) or because Jounouchi had actually made him take this seriously. He decided to not think about it, and just throw his eraser at Jouniouchi's head.

"AH!" Jounouchi yelped as the pink eraser bounced off his head. "WAAAAAAAR!" He grabbed the eraser and whipped it back, hitting Kaiba in the chest. Honda crumpled up a piece of paper and threw it at the brown haired rival. Anzu decided she was going to sit and watch and let Jounouchi, Honda and Kaiba get in trouble. Yugi decided to do what Anzu was doing.

"Take this!" Kaiba threw Jounouchi's books on the floor. Papers fell out of his books and were lying all over the place.

"Oh yeah?!" Jounouchi flung Kaiba's books on the floor, getting his papers mixed up with Jounouchi's. "Never mess with Cana-da-da!" Jounouchi cheered.

"Boys, this has gotten out of control, I demand you sit down!" The teacher tried to yell over them. Kaiba glared at Jounouchi and threw Honda's book at him hitting the blonde in the gut. This enraged Jounouchi and he lunged at Kaiba. The two were punching at kicking each other on the floor, cursing and yelling at each other. Kaiba got the upper-hand and pinned Jounouchi to the floor.

"Honda, back me up bud!" Jounouchi yelled, and the taller boy body checked the Young CEO off his best friend. "Good stuff!"

"No problem!" While the two were distracted by congratulating each other Kaiba ran into them both, knocking them to the floor.

"Surrender to me now!" He bellowed.

"I'd rather die!" Oh the drama.

"BOYS!" the teacher screamed. "That is it, this model UN is DONE! I thought you CHILDREN were mature enough to do this activity but as usual Jounouchi has to ruin everything."

"Oh sure, blame it ALL on me."

"Go in the hall. NOW. Kaiba, You too! Honda as well!" She pointed to the door angrily. Honda and Kaiba quickly exited.

"But we were only participating!" Jounouchi whined.

"GO. NOW." She demanded. Jounouchi left the room (sulking all the way) and stood against the wall with his friend and rival.

"That was an entertaining class." Honda smirked.

"Oh shut up, you geeks." Kaiba glared. "This is all YOUR fault, Dog-face."

"DOG-FACE?! Now that's just rude." Jounouchi crossed his arms. "And for your information, it's YOUR fault. You were the one obsessed with takin' my fresh water."

"Well, if you just had of submitted to me instead of retaliating-"

"Oh shut your big stupid face!" Jounouchi snapped. They continued to bicker back and forth, while Honda watched, slightly amused, but mostly annoyed. The arguing never stopped with these two. It'd be funny if it weren't so loud...and annoying...and obnoxious...and doing the same routine everyday. Actually it just wasn't funny anymore.

"You are a MUTT."

"Your FACE is a mutt!"

"Oh brother." Honda sighed.

END


End file.
